Tuesday, May 03, 2005

In response to yesterday's comments-

-I may or may not be on the Mighty Squirrels.

Either way, they are a team in the Blacktop Street Hockey League, which I am in, and they should be left alone.

In terms of the second question, "Onyxwolf" wants to know if "there is any more werewolf stuff."

Let me address that. First off, I am a werewolf, or until recently was. I still may be one, I just didn't change last month, and I'm still trying to figure that situation out.

Now listen.

I've said this before, and I'm sorry if I'm repeating myself, but fuck- Werewolves are people. You know, most of the time. For three nights a month, I turn into something awful, or did until recently. But this is not just a blog about a werewolf, it a blog about a man.

If you were to read a woman's blog, would you say "Um- yeah, that stuff about your life is interesting, but is there any more menstruation stuff?"

Cause, you know, that's something that happens three days a month to some people, and is not the sum total of their experiences, despite the equitable levels of savagery towards their fellow man that can result from it.

Also, if you can't spell "hockey" you're probably not that big of a fucking fan.

Still, I am a curious person, so I went to Onyxwolf's profile and found a blog.

Well, Christ- if that isn't the MOST CREATIVE THING I'VE EVER SEEN!

A blog from the perspective of a werewolf!

Holy shit!

What a genius!

Let's read from the first (and only) post:

to my blog. The days of a wolf. Why would I want to read about your life you say? Well its simple. I am no ordinary person. I am a werewolf. "


Hey shithead, guess what? There are no comments and no follow up posts!

Hey asshole- if you're really a werewolf, let us know about it. I'm curious, the scientists who are currently probing and questioning me are curious, and I'd guess that my readers are curious.

If you are not- go the fuck home.

I happen to be a huge fucking hockey fan, and at ten past twelve on the fourth of May, the fact that I am responding to this bullshit instead of watching Jerome Iginla tearing the ass out of the Stanley Cup playoffs has me pissed off enough without dealing with you.

If you have a problem with me taking some time on my blog to talk about stuff that is actually making me happy, then you are not a real werewolf, you're some kind of gamer douchebag who is making trouble on my blog because, I don't know, you're having trouble updating your own fucking blog without taking off the gloves of your fucking "furry" suit.

Kiss my ass.

Sorry if this was harsh, but I'm doing my best to police this thing, and I'm sick of having my life be the fucking playground of fetishists.

And while I'm at it, here's a hearty "fuck you" to all you zooskool degenerates who found your way here.

I know, I shouldn't keep typing the word, cause it only makes it worse, but I get a fair amount of pleasure from the idea that some scumbag who wanted to jerk off to photos of women blowing dogs found his way here.

So if that's you, fuck off.

And what really sucks is I had a really interesting conversation with Julie, the werewolf girl today, and I was planning on talking about that today.

I think she's crazy.

Either that, or I am.

Fuck it, I'm going to bed.


At 8:09 AM , Anonymous Rhonda said...

HAHAHA - Excellent blog - I love when you rip new assholes for people. Is it wrong to derive such amusement from your wrath?

Anyway, I think writing about other stuff makes you more well-rounded. Of course, the werewolf stuff is fascinating. But I'm also interested in how you handle day-to-day life, dealing with the other days of the month, as well...

So keep up the good work!

At 9:13 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow. blacktop street hockey seems pretty badass. but why is it so secretive? after all, you told us where you work. we could concievably go there and mess with you or whatever. so why is the hockey team innately more sacrosanct?

At 10:14 AM , Anonymous Ned Ludd, aka Faustus said...

This is Faustus again, but that blog name is already taken. I do look forward to hearing your responses to my Bruins fan flavored emails, which are too long for a comment here. Like many others, I was brought here by the werewolf stuff, and do look forward to hearing about things related to that most especially. Best, Faustus aka Ned Ludd

At 10:26 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kirk gave us his workplace because to him that's all it is: a means of income, a place to keep busy for 8-10 hours a day, a pretty-much-dead-end job. Hopefully not his chosen career path for the rest of his (super)natural life, but I make no assumptions.

But hockey... see, this is his sport, his passion, his excitement, his one chance to experience the Stanley Cup playoffs street-level style. You don't mess with someone's deep pleasures like that (unless it turns you on just as much and you really need that companion to share it with).

Anyway, good luck with your team, Kirk, even if they may or may not be named the Mighty Squirrles. Just be careful on the 22nd this month at whichever game you'll be in.


At 1:28 PM , Anonymous RobRoy said...

Hey, if you're jonesing for some hockey, the IIHF World Hockey Championships is in the preliminary round at the moment. Details here:


It's going on in Austria, so the games aren't happening at terribly convenient times for watching them live. Still, any port in a storm, as the saying goes. There's a Canada-USA game tomorrow at 2 p.m. (Eastern) that should be good, even though Jarome didn't make the trip.

At 3:13 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jerome Iginla tearing the ass out of the Stanley Cup playoffs

Nice metaphor, but if you can't even spell Jarome right you're probably not that big of a fucking fan.

Actually who am I kidding? Kirk, I forgive you because you made reference to my team and my homeboy Iggy. I love you Kirk. With my whole body, including my pee-pee. I want to have your baby.

At 4:35 PM , Blogger Onyxwolf said...

Sombodey was alittle cranky today. I am not going to use that blog I made anyway. I just made one to sign up. I am sorry I misspelled it. I cant be perfect. Ok dont even try and school me on werewolfs. I have so much lycanthrope info to...well I dont know what. But I have alot. Damn. Now I forgot what I wanted to say...I will tell you later then....

At 4:43 PM , Blogger Onyxwolf said...

Oh yeah. If I was here just to bug you guys I would have hacked the site already. And if you want me to update that blog I will. Dont really wont to though. And. I am a fan of hockey. There H. O. C. K. E. Y. I hope that makes up for miss spelling it earlyer. I was only interested in hearing more about that meetng because I am curious about how others weres handle things.

At 6:03 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, Onyxwolf is reaching new levels of lameness/TigerKitty-ness. When an internet discussion degrades down to "Yeah, well I could have hacked the site by now" that's when you need to back away - you are dealing with an ultimate lamer. That, or egg him on, like this guy:


At 5:34 AM , Anonymous g_darkwolf said...

first of all you still are a werewolf. the reason you didnt transform is because the full moon occured during the day. April 24, 2005 @ 6:07 am to be precise. if you dont believe me look it up on the navy website.
I Was a hockey fan once upon a time. then i heard they cancelled an entire season. oh and good luck. if you need anymore advice on you more nocturnal habits look me up at yahoo.

At 5:37 AM , Anonymous g_darkwolf said...

oh yeah forgot something. dont bitch if you get weres asking you about it. if you didnt want any help on the subject or if you didnt want anyone to know you shouldnt have said anything about it.

At 1:23 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ahh Kirk, you make my day. Please continue laying the smack down on fools. Onyxwolf, All I can tell you is chicks like guys with skills. Like hacking skills, nunchuck skills, bowhunting skills and grammar skills. Good luck with your hacking career.

Anyhow Kirk, what is this secret society of ball hockey you're in? Hotness. Do you have a secret handshake too? Anyways, It's Jarome Iginla. You might be able to remember this if you hum the 50 cent tune in the club to these handy lyrics. I make singing fun!

You can find me in the 'Dome
hanging with Jarome. . .

Anyhow if you were a real hockey fan you'd roll into a Bruins bar and yell go Flames go.

At 3:59 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, is it full moon again - just wondering why the silence - Ned Ludd aka Faustus here

At 4:15 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

a real rap fan would know it's "in da club"

At 6:49 PM , Anonymous Dickhead said...

Thanks for making Onyxwolf shut up, Kirk. The worst thing about the internet is all the stupid fuckers who tell us about how they're "vampyres" or "fayries" or "weyrewulvs." Err... present company excluded, of course.

And as to g_darkwolf's theory (I know, he's Onyxwolf with a new name, whatever), that's bullshit. The time of day can't matter, or at least not that accurately. Kirk changes for three days around the full moon.

At 10:35 PM , Anonymous g_darkwolf said...

no dickhead i'm not.And no I am not a werewolf, lycanthrop, therianthrope, furry, werevamp, vampire, vampyre, warlock, or anything else for that matter. I just happen to be a concerned reader who happens to have several acquitances who are in a similar situation to Kirk. And i have spent several years helping them deal with their "unique" situation. I admit i probably havent even scratched the tip of the iceberg when it comes to werewolves and lycanthropy, but what i do know is that they exist and i can sympathize with their pilght. I always try to help the ones i can. and to any of you fuckers who want to believe i am onyxwolf, fuck you. g_darkwolf stands for General Darkwolf, because in my youth i played a lot of realtime strategy military games like command and conquer. so fuck you. and seriously kirk if you need any advice just e-mail me at yahoo.

At 3:33 PM , Anonymous Dickhead said...


At 3:57 PM , Anonymous g_darkwolf said...

listen dickhead, if you got somthing else to say then YOU look me up. this shit is taking up too much room. lets take it outside the blog. onyxwolf sounds like they have no balls. i have a pair. so if you dare look me up. you cant miss me. and if you havent figured it out yet, just type my name in and put @yahoo. com behind it. duh.

and to onyxwolf. sorry, but you do come across as a bit of a pussy. nothing personal.


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